Archive for January, 2010

31
Jan
10

Craigslist – WTF once again

Wowsers Craigslist has done it again. Thank you Internets for keeping me entertained. Thanks to Kat for the link

I have this fetish, and well, it’s kinda weird. I like young guys, about 18-25, to come over to my place for some fun. Ideally they would be dressed in an orange tracksuit but that’s not essential. What I like to do is strip down, slow and sensual (you’d remain fully clothed) and open a few bags of regular party balloons. I will provide the balloons.

Can come to you, but would prefer to do it at home as it’s a hassle bringing all the balloons in the car, I’d need a suitcase or something.

It will be your responsibility to blow up as many balloons as you can, though I will be there to assist if you get out of breath at any stage. This will continue until my bedroom is literally filled with bright and bouncy balloons.

I will then sit down on my rocking chair, bedside, and request that you come closer to me. You will pick up a balloon and hold it close to my ear (can be left or right, preferably left). As I masturbate my penis, you will pick up the large needle from my bedside locker and pop the balloon in my ear. (The first balloon must always be red and the last blue, aside from that you may pop them in whatever order you like.)

The popping of balloons in my ear will continue to become more and more arousing to me until eventually I will come close to reaching a climax and stop. (I don’t feel I deserve to reach orgasm so I have trained myself not to)

After that, you will read me a short story from my childhood book of fairytales. Preferably something classic such as Cinderella or Snow White. I would love to drift off into a slumber feeling like the prettiest princess in all the land. You will be required to read to me until I am fast asleep. Don’t worry, it won’t take very long as I always sleep extremely soundly after partaking in a balloon service.

– Cuddy

http://perth.craigslist.com.au/m4m/1572151924.html

Craiglist proof

31
Jan
10

Special Dead ma

Special Dead

Yes, that is indeed a wheelchair bound dude with a chainsaw. How could that NOT be awesome?! That’s like a drive-by chainsawing! Of ZOMBIES! Let’s get a taste of the plot, shall we?

When a zombie plague infects Camp Special Dude, a dude ranch for the mentally handicapped, a ragtag band of campers and counselors struggles to survive the night. Led by the indifferent, nunchuck-wielding head counselor, Mac, and his wheelchair-bound sister Dale, the unlikely heroes fight their way off the mountain as, one by one, they’re picked off and join the ranks of the walking dead. It’s a campy stampede of blood, boobs and gore as some “very special” people show that they can kick some serious undead ass.

I highlighted my favorite parts of the summary. Almost just highlighted the whole thing, but figured I’d make an effort to pick out some stuff. Such as the nunchuck-weilding, or the girl named “Dale”. Oh yeah, and “Camp Special Dude”. That’s fantastic. I’m just not clever enough to come up with THAT offensive of a name for a summer camp for handicapped people. You can’t fake that kind of artistic mastery.

Now, if horribly mean-spirited movies about zombie retards are too offensive for you, perhaps you’d prefer Sars Wars: Bangkok Zombie Crisis.

31
Jan
10

The Making of the 2010 Pirelli Calendar by Terry Richardson

WARNING – NUDITY

Making airwaves was the recently shot 2010 Pirelli Calendar which brings together a remarkable topless cast of some of the world’s most beautiful women. The shoot– which includes the likes of Daisy Lowe, Lily Cole, Eniko Mihalik and Miranda Kerr– was photographed by Terry Richardson.

Terry Richardson (born 1965) is an American fashion photographer.

Richardson was born in New York City, raised in Hollywood and Ojai, California, and is the son of fashion photographer Bob Richardson. He attended Hollywood High School and Nordhoff High School in Ojai. He was shy as a teenager and at some times deemed “completely lacking in social skills”. He played bass guitar in the punk rock band The Invisible Government for 5 years. Richardson began photography when the band broke up and his mother introduced him to Tony Kent, photographer who took him on as an assistant.

31
Jan
10

Man Talk

This is a James Bond Classic. There is not way in hell you could get away with this in modern cinema.

In this Bond installment agent 007 investigates a smuggling operation run by the obsessive Billionaire Auric Goldfinger and uncovers a plot to irradiate the entire gold supply of the United States by detonating an atomic bomb inside Fort Knox in Kentucky.

In my opinion this little snipped is the best part of the movie. Sit back watch the 0:20 and prepare to chuckle.

Thanks for reminding me about this Rach 😀

Bond: Do you expect me to talk?

Goldfinger: No, Mr. Bond. I expect you to die!

30
Jan
10

Australia Bans Small Breasts

kate bosworth

small is still beautiful

You know that saying, “more than a mouthful’s a waste”? Yeah, me neither. And apparently neither does Australia. The country has decided to ban smaller looking breasts from adult content because of pedo-y concerns.

The ban (RC) on small breasted women in adult publications has been made by the Australian Classification Board allegedly on the grounds that such images could be construed as child pornography, even where those publications comply with American law and keep certification that performers are over 18.
Female ejaculation has been banned on the incredible grounds that “the depictions are a form of urination which is banned under the label of ‘golden showers’ in the Classification Guidelines” and/or “Female ejaculation is an ‘abhorrent’ depiction.” Notably here male ejaculation is completely legal under the same guidelines, attracting an X rating in Australia.

First of all, breasts of all sizes are awesome. And secondly, what’s up with this female ejaculation thing? Talk about a double standard. You outta be ashamed of yourself, Australia! And to think Britain used to use you as a giant penal colony. What happened?

[source]

29
Jan
10

Zombie Joke of the Week

Q: What’s black and white and red all over?

A: A nun being eaten by zombie babies

29
Jan
10

Broken Grey Matter – Does it Really Chupacabra Much?

Pulp Sci-Fi

I’m not sure if it’s all the JAG I’ve been watching, The copious amounts of comic books( 2000 AD tonight) or the lack of sleep but somehow I just skipped one whole hour. I just looked down at the clock on the corner of my screen and it was just past 01:00 and then BLAM it’s just after 02:00. JAG stopped playing a while ago and somehow I am about 3 Progs deep* and I don’t remember any of it. I’m gonna take this as a sign and try to get some downtime. This is starting to feels just a little to real all of a sudden.

I can’t wait for my legs to get better so I can start running again and get more glorious sleep.

*each issue is known as a prog